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09 February 2010 @ 07:54 pm

Everyday I come back from school overwhelmed by how much I'm behind time and how much more there is for me to do. I think the immediate few things I have coming right up after chinese new year are 2 presentations, 1 project proposal and possibly 2 midterm tests.

I still need to finish reading To the Lighthouse which is supposed to be easy reading but it's so long, science and tech readings, reading the potrait and all the freud/stuff I've yet to finish. Not to forget the SEA stuff.  I think I'm pretty stressed but I realised that I'm not the only one. Met Jessie on BTC and we both agree that the sem's really flying by. We met Ben at the bus stop where we alighted and as he took 153 with me I realised that he was going to Leeds for SEP next sem, the uni that Esther was allocated and she didn't want to go because she was afraid she didn't know anyone! -.-  And this reminds me that I've yet to finish doing my module mapping:(

On top of that, I felt like school was a waste of time. My 3 hour seminar time was turned into a 2 hour library lesson where they taught you how to use search engines-.- And the soci tutorial from 2-4pm was spent discussing how people move from rags to riches. Whattttttt. I swear at the rate that they were relating stories of famous people, I was tempted to say "Cinderella did too!" and as much as Ed found that amusing, I'm going to save myself the embarrassment.

Of course, the day's not all that bad. During the 2 hour break, I had a good time in our little hideout with Jill, Jerry and Samuel where we had a peaceful lunch with nice music and managed to dash down to the milo truck to bring up 9 cups of milo! Jill carried up 4 cups by herself, I managed 3 and Jerry only got 2. HAHAHA. When we entered the room, we disrupted Sam's beauty sleep.




During lunch, I also received a sweet message from my favourite pet that kept me smiling throughout the day despite the fatigue(:
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07 February 2010 @ 11:33 pm
I like long random evening walks, up and down slopes on roads where cars hardly drive.
I love sitting at different places where we can talk with ease and enjoy the silent companionship.
I'm happy holding your hand even if others stop to stare (hahaha!)
I think I could get used to having you around my house doing the simplest things with me
(even washing dishes is faster because you're there)

Hmm because all these things are the simple pleasures of life I've come to love(:
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07 February 2010 @ 01:36 am

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHARMAINE TOH:D 


It's about 130am in the morning and I should be sleeping soon since I've a lesson at 1030am tomorrow but since tonight was such awesome fun I have to write about it first! It started off with Alycia, Meixia, Pam and I getting lost on the way to NAFA for Thoroughly Modern Millie, the musical Nao was acting in. We were walking somewhere along city hall and finally decided to hop on a cab at 8pm - the time that the musical was supposed to begin. Thankfully, the musical didn't start on time or we'd have miss a part of the fabulous show.Kelynn was waiting for us with Nao's family at the reception area. Oh and the cast was really good and the entire musical was pretty entertaining. The male lead sounded wonderful (ahem pam! nao! :D ) and we really enjoyed ourselves there.

Then it was off for an impromptu supper with the few at prata house:D I shall skip the details but we definitely had a lot to laugh about:D
 
 
02 February 2010 @ 11:25 pm
The first month of 2010's past and on top of that crazy birthday week, it's been pretty eventful.
 
School's been tiring because I think I'm still not accustomed to using my brain and the weather's been quite a bother too (I know right, more fats means you feel warmer). I'm feeling ultra disorganized and I think I need just one day to sit down and plan out the rest of my work, assignments and deadlines for the school sem. All I've been hearing is assignments assignments and more assignments. I can't even put them into place. I hate being so disorganized and I hate feeling so behind. I need to reorganize the mess on my table that's definitely reflective of the mess in my head. I keep running away from work and for the first time in uni, I actually asked for an extension because I just couldn't think of how I was going to start the essay (I think all the time spent away from Singapore in Dec's not really good and I left my brain somewhere between bangkok and malaysia).

Okay, by this Sunday, the mess will be cleared, I will go for the run I've been pining for and I will be back on task.

And I think it's because I woke up at 630 this morning to attempt on my essay at 7am that I'm feeling really drained. I'm just waiting for someone to text me that he's home before I sleep. Sleepyyyy.

Once again, Happy Birthday Pet(:
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01 February 2010 @ 02:03 am

 


 
I think I'll give a more detailed entry of the week when I'm free. I just have to say that today (last night rather) was an awesome way to end the first month of the year even though we had to travel to Choa Chu Kang early in the morning to accompany my sisters and Cher to see some Korean singers we had no interest in before rushing down to the airport to send off Sa, Rachel and Cher's friend at different times of the evening/'night. Marcus and Cher were most entertaining and I had my favourite person with me throughout the day.

Eh but seriously! Wong Qibin! YOU'RE TOO SKINNY next time I'm hiding BEHIND you! (:

<3
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28 January 2010 @ 03:46 pm


One week ago, I'd never imagine myself to be this happy. Not that I was clinically depressed but I was practically empty.

It's strange how things can change within a matter of days when it remained stasis for years (one year and 364 days). And all it took was a moment of honesty and courage. Maybe if I had had that courage way back in time, I would have been a much happier person then. But nonetheless, I'm still very very happy now and I'm glad to say I survived the entire ordeal.

I'm sorry friends, for all these cryptic messages but you can probably guess what I'm writing about. I don't think I've announced anything officially but if you've been following me on LJ long enough you'd know (eh sama! that means you too!)

This week's passing quickly but wayyyy too slowly at the same time. The only thing that made me really happy since sunday was the long stroll from somerset to novena on a typical tuesday night. I can't wait for friday and then I can't wait for sunday! School's been a bitch but I've had awesome friends to pull me along and I know there's a fantastic someone who's with me at every step.


 
 
26 January 2010 @ 11:30 pm

DSC00623e.jpg picture by celchoe

And I don't mind long walks (even if they're from somerset to novena) as long as they're with you(:
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25 January 2010 @ 01:37 am
Because on this day I learnt the true meaning of being happy.
And I'm holding on to this dream even though I'm a little scared.

Sometimes songs from these silly little korean dramas can really be appropriate

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22 January 2010 @ 02:46 am
Just a random topic I discussed with James the other day.
We're so jaded with the life we have - there must be something more we can do.
Something bigger; something more meaningful

Life's just started, we'll figure it out in time to come.
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19 January 2010 @ 10:00 pm

Saturday morning was spent with my IJ GIRLS:D Despite all the not having a proper plan, I thought it was pretty fun flying kites, I think I got burnt in the process but I really really enjoyed the company there. So thank you guys for being there for me in every part of my life (eh Ali, somehow I included you into the IJ group:D ) From Primary 1 all the way til I'm 21 - there's always laughter with you guys around and really, IJ friends are friends for life. And to ghis, kelsey and z who weren't there, I miss you guys!!!




ijgirls.jpg picture by celchoe

Anyway, I headed down to CJ to meet the choir people (Andrea, Cher, Daniel, Isaac, Qibin, Qimin, Marcus)  for the Bye, Brother dinner after a shower and a change of clothes. Mass felt somewhat different, to me at least. Hm... ask me about this some other time. I don't really feel like elaborating. But it was really quite sad to know that Brother Paul will be leaving and rather heart wrenching to see him cry:( Dinner was average (I'm being nice, I actually didn't like the food) but the performances were awesome.

But it seemed like it was only after the dinner when the night really begun. Okay, I'm gonna blog this under a cut because there'll be much more words and pictures than I really have. It should be documented to justify their efforts -


 
the hilton surprise:D :D )

 And when I thought that all celebrations had ended. I was surprised with a bouquet of blue roses from Yeekai last night:D

21st Birthdays are supposed to be memorable, this definitely was. I feel like I had my closest friends with me on that day and that was really really more than anything I could ask for. Thank you guys <3<3




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17 January 2010 @ 07:46 pm

Can I be excused just for this once if I flood everyone's pages with pictures, videos and words because I feel like this is one event that should be placed down in words since so much time, effort and laughter has been spent on it. So even without a massive party, I really really did enjoy my twenty-first because of my AWESOME FRIENDS and FAMILY. And I really really mean AWESOME.

So the celebrations didn't really begin on the 16th itself, in fact on 14th I had a dinner with some of my favourite interns <3 I'm really really grateful that my favourite girls turned up to meet me, especially LIXUAN knowing how busy she always is. THANK YOU GIRLS and it doesn't matter that you wrote the messages for me in front of me, it doesn't make them any less sweet:D
interns.jpg picture by celchoe

Family dinner at some hotel which I really can't recall the name but the buffet was awesome since there was a fondue and salmon, yums. My sisters surprised me with a pretty pretty cake desigined by EUNICE. It didn't take much effort for me to recognise that it was decorated by her but I was rather surprised at how well it turned out to be. Really nice:D The cream smearing on the face, however, wasn't really necessary! HAHA. omggg the cake's REALLY PRETTY:D
twentyfirst.jpg picture by celchoe

Okay, then I was doubly surprised that night by Edith and Fel & Mel and James! The pics are still with Mel but basically, they planned to come separately, met downstairs coincidentally and came upstairs together, giving me a shock:D Okay, more about the actual day itself in another entry once the pictures are loaded on fb!
.



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13 January 2010 @ 07:28 pm
So I've been feeling pretty down the past few days not because of anyone but because of everything.

It's almost like 2010 started off with the intention to torture me. Making me decide about SEP and all. For some reason or another, I can't even fathom why I applied for it because my enthusiasm for it has waned so much that it wasn't even on my mind until I saw the dreaded email. Honestly, the first thought that came to my mind was that if I go and should something happen to my grandfather, I'd feel like crap for life.  No, it isn't because it's some obligation to feel sad that you weren't there for a family member but because I've always been closest to my grandparents, yea, I'm not even that close to my own parents. So it became quite a struggle for me to decide. Such a simple issue resulted in many nights of prayers and tears. I don't even remember crying half as much in 2009. I think I'm going - or I'll finish up with the applications rather - and let fate decide (I feel like laughing at this).

Then it's back to school with piled up work, one module short and an overwhelming amount of reading. I'm pretty sure if I didn't have the lit majors to laugh with and joke with daily, I'd sink into depression. I'm pretty thankful for Andrea who's passed me her entire set of psycho A notes and the bunch of them who lunched today especially keith, esther, jerry and samuel. Without them, school would be most dreary.

But what's even more depressing was that during psychoA today, I was forced to look back at events of past years realising that I hadn't come to terms with them. I've closed these issues, I think I've let them all go but it would be more accurate to say that I've successfully repressed every single memory so much so that I believe that none of them had ever existed and I had always been making them up (until I was forced to see them again today, of course). For some reason, I think I could live without these memories. I really could and I'm happier without them but one day, I'd have to come to terms with them. I just know.

James would have liked today's lecture. I'm pretty sure. It touched on grounds that we've been through before. On issues Pete brings up on a regular basis. It's nothing new. But it's quite a feat staying awake during lecture, steel.

Yes, I'm feeling emo, a rare public display of emotion (especially when I hardly feel any emotion nowadays).And  I'm doing my best not have too many locked private entries this year, I think it's starting off fine.
 
 
11 January 2010 @ 01:51 am

And today marks the end of my short december hols - 2010 hasn't been the best thus far. Too many decisions, it's almost like I'm forced to grow up faster just because my birthday's earlier. There are so many decisions to make by this month, just because.

At least the day before hell begins has been rather peaceful. A late morning, slow walk, car ride (joy ride:D - haha!), a quick jog with marcus and qb. Then dinner with the rest! It's feels awesome to see James, Moses, Buns, Song and Jo again (thank you Jo for organising this mass gathering cause it must not have been easy). And I'm so gonna miss relaxing nights like these where we can just sit around and play card/board games for 2 hours, chill out with Tau Huay the minute the clock strikes 2pm tomorrow - it's the start of the 13 weeks of hell.

So anyway, HELL begins with a 2 hour lecture tomorrow (I'm still 1 module short btw). And usually I'd give intro mods like these a miss especially when (... keith would understand...) but because it's project save C-A-P, I shall stick to my resolution to go for lectures no matter how dreary they will be. Just 2 pictures to sum up all the fun and laughter we had tonight.


James with his expensive but small prata


(song the chimp - check out the resemblance)


In the meantime, I shall rid depression by killing zombies.
 


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09 January 2010 @ 02:12 am


The scenarios would definitely be reversed.

Ghis: I can't eat anymore, I'm stuffed.

Nao: Okay, I eat for you!

Mx: Eh, no one wants already? I eat.

And when there's finally no more food, someone would definitely suggest "Dessert??"

pam. says:
you mx and nao would be scrambling for the food or smth la

And pam, would be quietly eating.



<3<3
 
 
07 January 2010 @ 01:22 pm
Wilson/Vincent's send-off



3D2N chalet




Mambo!




Okay, that's enough for now!
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06 January 2010 @ 01:26 am



"Don't you ever think of going back?"

Silly question. There are threads that help you find your way back, and there are threads that intend to bring you back. Mind turns to the pull, it's hard to pull away. I'm always thinking of going back. (...) People go back, but they don't survive, because two realities are claiming them at the same time. Such things are too much. You can salt your heart, or kill your heart, or you can choose between the two realities. There is much pain here. Some people think you can have your cake and eat it. The cake goes mouldy and they choke on what's left. Going back after a long time will make you mad, because the people you left behind do not like to think of you changed, will treat you as they always did, accuse you of being indifferent, when you are only different.


Oranges are not the Only Fruit
Jeanette Winterson


 
because it's never too late to reflect on the year before )
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04 January 2010 @ 11:27 am

It's strange that I'm starting this year with a post about the last especially when I firmly believe that the past should always be left behind and not re-visited but because the pictures were up only recently and I have some OCD about not posting recent things before I finish talking about past events, here goes: 

Remember the post about christmas (just one post before the new year one):

Where we began with a feast that made us so full, we could hardly move but could still camwhore. And where I was first introduced to this novel concept of ham and jam-
christmas.jpg picture by celchoe

Then we played Taboo where we split into two groups TEAM IJ vs  TEAM SJI





This was followed by Twister which was played by TEAM SJI while we, IJ girls, directed them





Then we had that fantastic ride down to Dempsey where we camwhored again in all permutations and combinations. No kidding, this is going to be under cut because I'll be flooding everyone's friends page with all the permutations and combinations.


camwhoring in all permutations and combinations )

And, we're officially done with 2009.
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01 January 2010 @ 02:53 am

So maybe I'm a little too lazy to move on to a new space because I hate the hassel of shifting entries and templates from one place to another which means I'm still stuck here but of course, things are no longer the same. Situations have changed. While this LJ started off as a place for me to keep A LOT of my secrets locked (literally) I think now it serves to lock them behind me. One day I'll look at those entries in amusement or even dis-amusement and laugh at my own foolishness. I can't say the year's ending the same way it started - but -

So moving on - here are some pictures from new year's eve random activities which caused us to start out wayyy to early in the morning but started off way to late because when we reached the marina barrage at around 12pm, we realised it was supposed to be closed. Went ahead with our plans nevertheless and successfully sent a kite flying up in the sky (okay, team SJI did it successfully while team IJ was stuck with a stupid little kite that was so difficult to fly).
theendof2009.jpg picture by celchoe

Then we made this random decision to go prawning after (even though I don't eat prawns and I hate seeing the poor prawns struggle to their deaths) where we had an awesome lunch of satay and chicken wings. James joined us somewhere in-between. Moses managed to catch two prawns but one escaped. So Songyao actually bargained for more prawns which we took to Ali's house but did not eat. Headed off to a park nearby for MORE kite flying and slacking about the playground. I like spontaneous activities.


By the time I got to my aunt's house for dinner, I was dead tired and was in a daze during the few games of bridge which I played with my cousin and sisters. I still am tired but I wanted to write my year end/ start of the year post.

I couldn't imagine for myself how much can change within a year; how people you never knew just slide into your life when you need them the most and people you've always wanted to keep close seem to wriggle out. And because change is always inevitable you move on. I can't say I really liked this year despite all the fantastic things that happened, it's probably one of the worst years in my life.  But what doesn't kill you makes you stronger I can really say I am.

So if I had to sum up this year in a word I'd say - liberation.

And really, I need to thank all of you who have been with me up to now. I know I'm not the easiest person around.

Hello 2010 - the year where I really really need to pull up my CAP. No one will understand my desperation now.
 
 
27 December 2009 @ 01:44 am
 I think I'm usually easy-going and obliging. Not a least bit mahfan:D
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25 December 2009 @ 12:24 pm

Last night was one helluva way to spend christmas eve and the first few hours of christmas. We had a mini gathering at Mel's house - Fel, James, Qibin and I. Mel and I actually came up with a potential menu for our dinner gathering a few weeks back that we personally prepare on christmas eve. We wanted a roast turkey, beef, pasta, baked potatoes, salad, logcake and wine.

Under unforseen circumstances, the menu changed. We had Shepard's pie and curry & bread prepared by Mel's mum. Pasta that my mum prepared. Fel made really yummy tiramisu! James and Qb bought chips, bailey's, logcake and HAM&JAM. WHO EATS HAM AND JAM TOGETHER? When James first mentioned that they were buying ham and jam I honestly thought they were just trying to rhyme but when I saw the ham and the blackcurrent jam, I realised that it wasn't a joke. A truly novel way of eating that none of us girls have heard of and the two boys claimed to have been eating this strange dish from young.

After we were all stuffed with food because we kind of over-prepared, we played a few rounds of TABOO! where we spent so much energy laughing, we could have dessert after that. In one particular game, team SJI (consisting of James, Qb and Mel's primary 3 brother) had to guess the word "pierce" and Qb was desperately trying to describe it to James through the description of piercing ear holes but instead of using the word "pierce" like normal people do, James used to word "punctured" - hahaaha- puncture a ear hole. 
 
POST dessert saw us taking a risk on the adventure of our lives - a ride in Mel's car (after Fel left). Before we were even out of our condo's compound, she already mounted the curb once and nearly crashed into the wall. We made it to Dempsey successfully and took about 15 minutes trying to park the car nicely into the lot but we still failed in the end. But it was the trip home that was most exciting! After dropping qb off, we were cruising along the highway peacefully when a crazy car sped past us. Mel panicked, swerved right and crashed her right mirror. So from that moment onwards, we were practically driving around without knowing what dangers lurk on the right while changing lanes. But we managed to get back home safely albeit the little adventure.

Oooh we took so many pictures last night on Mel's new camera! I'll post some here once she uploads them - that may mean weeks later when she gets back from Japan.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!
 


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